Renouncing Judgement

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“If you stumble about believability, what are you living for? Love is hard to believe, ask any lover. Life is hard to believe, ask any scientist. God is hard to believe, ask any believer. What is your problem with hard to believe?”
― Yann Martel, Life of Pi

Often times, people tend to question values outside of their beliefs.  Rarely do you find people questioning the individuals representing these values, or at least, taking the time to know the inner psyche of said person.  They may question one’s principles, but not one’s character.  Until they find a reason to.

Now, what happens when our sense of self is questioned?  Do we focus our energy in trying to fix our character?  Do we realign our values just for the subjective experiences of those around us?  A part of us knows that their perceptions are subjective.  Yet, why do we believe that these notions are inherent to reality, limiting who we could be as a person? 

We as humans fear the absence of possibility, and limit ourselves in doing so.  Now, what does this mean?  Simply put, we fear the loss of what others could become, and we also fear what we’d become in failing to reach our potential.  This breeds the desire to fix the people dear to us.  We tell ourselves that their personal growth is a reflection of our own capabilities.  When these people do not grow, we fail.  Or so we believe.

The development of others is often times outside of our control, through no fault of our own.  Our efforts to bring out the best in everyone may be judged if they themselves aren’t ready for change.  Does this make them bad people?  Of course not.  Yet, when we forget to keep this in mind, we end up challenging their own values, creating unnecessary conflict.

When we as individuals are met with judgement, we must remember to give these people room to grow.  We must remember that we were once like these people.  We’ve all been at a point where our doubt has consumed our potential.  Trying to inspire growth may be an arduous process.  Knowing this, we must accept that these people may never change.  They may never come to believe in what’s possible because their lives have taught them otherwise.  

So you, as a person, must believe in their growth by working towards your own self development.  You must believe in your ability to create potential.  In doing so, even if you fail to guide these people onto a path for growth, you will find many more willing to grow with you.  People that believe in possibilities.  

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